Now it seems while I’ve been away, a country not usually associated with all things lunar has had a right result during their first moon shot.  How embarrassing it that for the all-singing-all dancing, roughty-toughty NASA boys.

As far as I can remember the Ruskis have popped up there, and the yanks have been up there so many times it’s wonder there isn’t a McDonalds up there.   Which makes me think, what the hell were they doing on the moon.  They must have spent billions upon billions of dollars looking at the surface, but had no one thought of looking underneath it?  Call me old fashioed but drilling might have been the way forward!  The Indians went up in nothing more than a bunch of tin cans welded together and five gallons of four star, and returned with the news that everyone was hoping for, there is a water based substance on the moon.

True to form, I think, the yanks weren’t testing samples at all, I mean, how many tests can you run on a bone dry material for God sake.  No, no, I think they were looking for new areas to build real estate on just to beat any on coming recessions, or slap a stars wars base up there without anyone knowing.   The water rubbish, well that could be sorted out at a later date.  If you were really cute you could open your own shop up there selling all kinds of bottled H2O, you’d make a swift killing alright.  How about a long pipe which could siphon water from here on earth.  Or, bloody or then, pull the moon into our atmosphere and see how long it takes to fill up with rain. 

Hey, it’s as plausible as thinking that people could land on the moon, but deep down we all know the footage was shot on a film set somewhere in the Nevada desert, and everyone is sworn to secrecy or death.  Why do you think  they always land in the same place for.  Why haven’t any women gone up there?  Cos they can’t bloody reverse into a tight space, that why.  No, it’s all bollocks as far as I can see, and a waste of green backs.  Let’s worry about how much water there is on earth, and how we can spread it about before we start getting ahead of ourselves.  My proposal, find away of producing water from a different source.  I’ve been working on a few experiments myself you know.  Oh yes, I don’t just sit here writing old toot all day.  I’m testing a new formula today in fact.  It took some lengthy operations, two minutes in some cases, but I’m satisfied with the trials so far.  I boiled a kettle, let the steam enter a cardboard box, and let it dry.  Then I repeated the procedure until the box was full.  On Tuesday it goes on sale in Tesco’s, it’s called, Walton’s all new dehydrated H2O.  Just add water and you’ve got a refreshing drink!

Bipolar Bill hath returned (“,)

PS  You remember I mentioned pulling the moon into our atmosphere… catch next weeks edition to find out how we’re doing on that score.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 9th, 2009 at 5:06 pm and is filed under Neils Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.