Well it didn’t take long to piss somebody off, and it was the North Koreans who copped the hump when the South Korean flag was shown at the women’s football match at Glasgow’s Hampden Park on the first day of the games.  The Olympic organisers apologized and after an hour and a round of Dachshunds in batter and mushy peas, the match began.   

Culture secretary, Jeremy Hunt narrowly missed hitting by standers during a live BBC interview.  Just after he mentioned, “There are huge amounts to get right,” and, “There are always one or two teething problems,” he rang his bell and it shot off the handle into a small group of people.  Sod’s Law or a sign of things to come?  Talking of bells, how much did the one cost that was used to open the games with?  What ever it was it was a waste of money – it only got hit once!

As for the ones that say, “I’m not going south of the river this time of night guv,” yes, you should have booked a holiday.  You knew the games were coming seven years ago, so why start moaning about a loss in cab fares now?  Honestly, they still think they drive anywhere just because they’ve got a black cab.

Everyone seems to be getting on well with each other in the Olympic village.  Well, except the Syrian team that is.  They started fighting amongst each other from the day they arrived.  NB team GB won knob all on the first day.  

Is it sport?  Hand ball, no.  Table tennis, err, no.  Fencing?  I don’t think so and air rifle shooting?  I think not.  Hand ball is a beach holiday activity.  Ping pong is something that you play at home on the dining room table on a wet Sunday afternoon.   Fencing is what one does when one goes to public school and air rifle shooting is something that you do in your back garden when you think no one is looking and mum and dad are out – much the same as archery.

The air rifle event, in this case, would look more at home in a local fair, except these guns haven’t got a slight kink in the barrel and you win more than a goldfish that dies the minute you get it home.  At least as a fairground attraction you can hold the gun up yourself.  The Olympic version of projecting a tiny lead pellet under a great amount of air pressure is strapped to a post, lazy I called it.

Now, you’ve bought your tickets, why haven’t you turned up?  Seb-baby isn’t happy.  He came to me for support and an answer to his problem and I said, “Who really gives a monkey’s?  And, “You can lead a horse to water but you’ll never make a silk purse out of a kangaroo’s wedding tackle…

For local, national and international bipolar news, please check out the website. www.forwardbipolar.com

This entry was posted on Sunday, July 29th, 2012 at 11:52 pm and is filed under Neils Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.