Well, there was uproar, and down-roar, after dear old Blighty’s bid for the World Cup failed to make the grade. And, if all of the dirt dug up by the BBC’s Panorama team, with talk of bribes and corruption holds water, I’d like to think that fairly soon we can all enjoy witnessing the dung of football making contact with the whirly thing that cools the room down.
Is it all about the game? I don’t believe it is anymore. Is it all about the money and the power? Ooh, now your talking my kind of language. England’s bid team were promised votes that didn’t materialise. Oh well, better not make a scene. On the flip side, Russia’s Mr P didn’t even turn up on the day of the ballot. No, instead, he waltzed in sometime later recounting tales of how Leningrad was bombed during the Second World War and how football has helped Russians endure such ‘tragic’ deprivation over the years. Methinks we didn’t have a good enough sob story!
The bid cost a cool 15 million big ones to put together, and how many votes did we secure? Two! And one of those was from a fellow countryman – fan-fucking-tastic! The maths is simple. Add what an inquiry might cost, to investigate why our bid went, babies feeding aparatus upper most, and I reckon you could supply water to those parts of the world where there is next to none.
Even though two FIFA officials have banned from voting, due to bank accounts that were swelling nicely, Sepp Blatter, that well known bathroom cleaner, has never organised an inquiry. When asked at a press conference, what would it take for an investigation to take place, Mr Blatter replied, evidence would have to be provided by official channels. When a reporter asked FIFA’s media office what that meant, they said, we have no idea. Hold on, I’ve just got to plug in a new Glade room fragrance, why, it’s waffle and bullshit!
So Russia, with a history of poisoning, spying and failing to recover nuclear subs from the bottom of the ocean, have secured the World Cup fairly and squarely, and who would believe it, so have Qatar. (They were rank outsiders at the start of the bidding) Now, call me Mr Picky but, what have the two countries got in common? Well, one is definitely much, much, much, much bigger than the other. However, the smaller one does an extraordinary large amount of oil. Well it would I suppose, as it is equidistant from Saudi Arabia, Iraq and Iran. Now that is interesting.
Surely the World Cup venues aren’t chosen, nay manipulated in some way, because of who’s got what in the energy department? Now if only we had some coal…
But hey, who’s going to take anything I’ve got to say seriously, I’ve got a mental health history as long as both of your arms, and consequently I’m a non human! However, on a serious note, when people say, “You’ve got to think outside the box,” you should take stock. The ‘box’ to ‘watch’ is the one ‘I’ allow to flash periodically in the corner of my front room, because there are some amongst us that believe everything that spews from it
Right, I must dash, I’m organising a pole vault and senna pod party at an old people’s home…
Comments
Powered by Facebook Comments